Legend of the Legendary Legends
by Ciruno Rowe 'Augmented Conduit
Summary: Three villains, one ray sphere, one princess always kidnapped, seven unlikely major heroes, one combined world. Oh and the humor genre. This is a legend of the legendary legends of brawlers and all stars as they try to save the world. Of course the heroes only made things worse. Humor focused fic so give it a read. Heroes will be Mario, Link, Snake, Evil Cole, Kratos, Nathan, Dante


**Warning, this is a parody fic that makes fun of most character and have them act all completely ooc. They still retain their old personalities but have different actions then what would the canon version of them do. This is a parody and is made as a mental jab at them just to poke fun, not to insult.**

**So if you're a sensitive little kid, ****_with my nicest and cheeriest voice and an equally amused expression I say_****, ****_get out of the internet and cry to your momma and don't bother reading this then_****. If you're a reader who reads these things, please enjoy your stay.**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of these characters.**

**Flame warning: I will kick you in your sleep if you do this. Anonymous reviews will be left there**

**This is a story about a mixed up messed up world of the All Stars and the Brawlers.**

A mysterious group of villains are plotting to take over the world by using the power of the Ray Sphere. Once this weapon is unleashed, chaos would fall on this world.

Who would rise up to stop them!?

**Mario Mario, the Hero, Nintendo's Mascot**

"It's a-me Mario!" Said plumber had just kicked a door open. He entered the room with a leap, the yellow cape behind him flapping dramatically. "And I heard another one of your villainous schemes! I have come to defeat you Bowser!"

The person inside stopped what they were doing, which was practicing some karate kicks. "You got the wrong house," Parappa muttered, still drinking his tea.

The plumber looked around the area for awhile. Inside the dojo, only Parappa was training. Master Onion and his students were missing, only the dog like creature was there. The plumber let out a surprised oh.

"Sorry. Excuse me," Mario left the building immediately.

…

**Nathan Drake, the Sharpshooter, Man with an AK47**

"The Ray Sphere huh? Sounds pretty cool," Nate muttered as he examined the picture of the device. Despite the strong winds baffling the horse caravan, he was able to keep a tight hold of it. And despite the forest path's shadows, the sun was enough to give out enough light. "And this is actually the first thing that we're looking for that's not primitive."

"Well you gotta admit, hunting down artifacts and saving the world can get tiring," Victor Sullivan, Nate's father figure snatched a peek. He leaned back on his edge of the caravan. "Why exactly are you looking for this Nate? Sure they pay seems nice, but don't you think other people would be looking for this? We're gonna be facing professional killers here and whatnots."

"I know Sully," Nate packed the picture back on his journal. "But like you said before, we're professional survivors. They have nothing on us."

"Didn't you notice that wherever you go, something falls apart?"

"Come on Sully, you have to put more faith in me. I mean look, we're riding a caravan instead of a car. That'll make us less obvious don't you think?"

"I don't know. I still think that something's going to happ-"

"There they are!"

Sully couldn't finish. Immediately after arriving on a curve on the path bandits came to view, all of them sporting swords and deadly rifles. And they were blocking the way. All of them pointed their weapons and began running towards the caravan. All occupants of the caravan let out terrified screams, while the rest cowered in fear.

"Get them!"

"She's there!"

"Don't move or we'll kill ya!"

The bandits surrounded them, making escape not an option. All were afraid. Except for Nate, Sully and a hooded person.

"See what did I tell you Nate?" Their reaction was so casual that it almost looked comical. "Everything you touch turns to sh-"

"I get it," Nathan interrupted as he pulled out his own firearm. His famous AK47. "I get it. Now we should start shooting before we get our stuff stolen."

The hooded person close to them only gave them a glance. She was secretly readying knives.

…

**Link, the Swordsman, The Hero with a Skirt**

Link only stared at the beast in front of him. The large trash golem too only stared back. No one said a word, "not even a shout. The only noise made was from the trash golem moving about.

Then the golem conduit pulled its arm back, and began firing a rapid burst of mini-fireballs. Link brought out his shield to block them. All of the bullet-like projectiles were blocked. The hero didn't even move from his position.

The golem conduit halted its assault and suddenly amassed a giant fireball in front of it. The fireball was launched, but with a simple swing of his sword, Link had destroyed the fireball in midair with an energy blast. He let out a tired sigh before walking towards the creature, not even fazed. He was only supposed to get Zelda once she arrives in here anyway. Then, get her off this island at the port. The city was pretty nice though. But he still needed to get Zelda off this island and into safety. It was not nice of her to just suddenly leave, with her only signs of ever leaving a small sticky note that says "Taking vacation. Pick me up at the Warrens"

"Look mommy! It's a guy with a skirt facing a giant robot!"

"Now Timmy, what did I tell you about being stupid?"

"Ha! The kid's right! The dude's wearing a skirt!"

"What a gay guy!"

A vein popped on Link's temples. He dashed forward, avoiding the Golem Conduit's stomp. He slashed twice, hitting the person inside. The garbage men fell apart soon, with the conduit koed. The giant junk robot's now useless parts fell all around.

"I'm not a queer!" With enough anger to rival Kratos, Link swung his blade forward, and another wave of energy came towards the speaker.

**Kratos, the Ace, The God of Rage**

"Have an ice cream cone!"

"No!"

"Who doesn't love an ice cream cone?"

"ME! Now shut up!"

"Sure you won't try one?"

"NEVER!"

"What if I force them down your throat?"

"I'LL KILL YOU!"

"They increase your move speed by 25% and increase damage dealt by 10% for every bite."

". Maybe I should take one..."

"That'll be fifty dollars for all of them."

"HELL NO!"

"How about sixty?"

"You increased the price! Do you think I'm stupid!?"

"Hmm, good point. How about seventy?"

"What kind of Punchline are you aiming at!?"

"Don't know. We're still lost though. Let's ask for directions."

An ice cream truck stopped right beside a small place called Onett. The vehicle stopped right by a child, who was standing just outside his house. The blonde kid only stared at the vehicle, seemingly playing with some sort of snake. Sweet Tooth opened the window and smiled at him.

"Hello boy!" The clown pulled out some sort of map. "Do you know the way to Empire City? Heard it's the best place to get more powers."

The child meekly pointed at his left. The path they were heading towards to.

"Ah we were heading on the right place! Thanks kid!" Sweet Tooth tossed out an ice cream cone. "Here, have an ice cream cone."

Lucas barely caught the ice cream cone. By the time he recovered, the ice cream truck was already speeding away. He watched it leave, eventually turning to the size of a speck. They'd probably survive the desert they needed to cross with their ice cream. On the other hand…

Lucas looked back at the path where they came from. Flames lit the houses nearby, everyone panicking. Cars were crushed and somehow buildings were destroyed. There's injured people, but not too severe. No one seemed to have died yet.

… "What in the world is happening?"

...

**Evil Cole, the Vigilante, the Demon of Empire City (Several minutes ago before Link's scene)**

_I am the demon of Empire City. I have control over all this place. This is my town. I have full control over this place. Anyone who rises against me will be put down. Look at Alden, Kessler, and even Bertrand. I am ruthless, I am a force you don't want to mess with. I am feared throughout the city!_

_No one is stronger than me. Not the police, not the Militia, not the rebels, not the Dust Men, Ice Men or First Sons. I am a Go -_

"Excuse me?" A certain green clad warrior approached him looking at a map. "Can you point me to the direction of the Warrens? I'm kinda lost."

"Sure," Evil Cole pointed at the island directly north of them. "Just keep heading that path. Watch out for the Dust Men though. Heard they're having a party, and although they offer free food rumors say they're dirty. Avoid the drunk conduits too."

"Alright thanks."

_Now where was I? Oh yes. I used the Ray Sphere twice. I have used seven Blast Cores and gained the power of The Beast. Although I keep the latter's power hidden, I can still beat anyone who stands up against me. With the powers of thunder, flame and oil, I am unstoppable._

Evil Cole raised his right arm and a lightning whip formed. He tossed it at a child, and pulled him back, barely avoiding the car that was coming. The kid let out a yelp, but landed on his feet. Evil Cole approached the trembling kid (who wouldn't be when they were almost ran over by a car?)

"You okay kid?"

"Y-y-yes."

"Where's your parents?"

"T-t-they're right over there…"

"Well go to them. Don't go running on streets like that. You could get killed."

"A-a-alright,"

The kid ran off towards the parents nearby. The two of them were also running towards their child with a worried look. Evil Cole sighed at the sight.

_Back to what I was saying. I can manipulate electricity and use magnetism. Heck I'm plenty durable. Fire and Napalm powers make me pretty destructive. Lately I might have gained an ability that allows me to control gravity. Maybe I can make a black hole with it. In any other cases, my power is destructive and chaotic._

_Anyone who stands up against me, will perish. Anyone that is a threat to me, doesn't exist. Because, I, AM, GO-_

"Hey it's the demon!" A pair of tourists and a couple more civilians approached him. One of them was carrying a reaper jacket. Not a full hoodie one, probably made by themselves. "Can we get your autograph?"

"Sure," Cole grabbed the jacket and began signing it.

"Oh God it's the badass demon!"

"The electric man!"

"I want to be like him when I grow up!"

_A god I am. That's what I've been trying to say. But lately it looks like I'm more of an anti-hero…_


End file.
